Privacy is a very interesting issues due to the fact that it has changed greatly over the years. When DoubleClick bought Abacus in the 90’s there was great debate over bringing together offline and online data for the purpose of ad targeting. Ultimately, it was agreed to keep the businesses separate. However, Double Click could not even really use that data or fuse it together in a coherent way since real time ad targeting would not become possible until 7-8 years later. All the hoopla, a solution to a problem that didn’t really exist. The key issue at the time was consumer advocacy. As a consumer its scary when someone can target me with advertisements. If you’ve seen Minority Report, with Tom Cruise, you’ve seen ads changing as you move through the street. This is actually possible today (though retina scanning isn’t generally used for it!). However, also as a consumer, at least most consumers, will trade privacy for anything: free content, a nickel or anything else.
Before going into the issues, it is important to look at the various kinds of data that is out there and how it all comes together:

1. 1.    Credit Files:  This is your credit report files. Your mortgage and financial status is determined on it. Did you know that your credit score was created by a private company (FICO) and that your credit reports are housed by private companies (Experian, Equifax, Transunion). These are very sensitive. If someone steals your identity and say takes out a mortgage, it is then written to your credit file and it can be very difficult to get it removed.

1. 2.    3^rd party data: Any marketer out there can append data to your file using fields such as address, email or phone as a ‘key’ to match against. This has been going on as long as I can remember as marketers can trade and buy data to make their own marketing smarter. There are so many rich data sources now such as facebook, twitter, etc… that it very quickly can become a very deep user profile.
   1. Vendor purchase histories:  your history of stuff that bought from vendors are often resold
   2. Data Appends: Experian will sell you 200+ data points on you. Rapleaf has very powerful data sets tied to email.
   3. Public Records: there is a TON of data that is available publicly, some tied to zip codes, others to addresses and others to individuals (such as your voting history)

1. 3.    Online Cookie Data: when you visit a website, a cookie is dropped on your computer and that cookie can track where you go on the web. While there are more advanced cookies (Flash) and deeper tracking (toolbars/browser level) it all functions basically the same. The cookie tracks where you go, where you click etc… and reports back. Then based on your behavioral pattern, you are served ads you are likely to respond to.  This leads to higher quality (though sometimes scarier) advertising and is essentially the first step towards the advertising in minority report. With cookies and behavioral targeting (which simply means based on your web based user behavior)  you are trading content, generally free for ads you will likely respond to – which should be better than random ads anyway.
2. 4.    Geolocational mobile data: This is deep tracking of where you are based on either your mobile device or where you check-in on services like foursquare or facebook. This data allows a retailer to show you a coupon when you are around the block. Also by checking in to foursquare you are opening yourself up to stalking as people will know where you are. The way to protect against this is with awareness though.

Privacy can be broken into 3 issues:

1. Data Security:  We read about cases of credit cards being leaked all the time. This  is in fact a serious issues. The data security that you need to worry about is sensitive financial data. Cookie data is never secure. You can see your cookies on your browser and it really doesn’t do anything but allow better ad targeting. The data you want to make sure is secure is your financial data and social security number. Currently, all data is being bunched into the same bucket though there is a huge difference between data that can harm you  (your credit card numbers) and data that can help you (targeting).
   1. An important thing to look at here is penalties. Visa often fines merchants for data breaches, which is used as a tool to extract more revenue. However, Visa is not fined enough for allowing breaches to occur. This data is sensitive.
   2. Mobile: Apple may say they won’t share your UDID (personal identifier) for privacy reasons yet they track your geo without telling you and using your UDID for their own ad targeting. At least on the surface that appears what is happening with Apple.  All carriers you have to assume are tracking you.

1. Transparency (optin/optout):  Another important issue is transparency in that consumer have the right to know their data is being sold and shared. The truth here is that sure you can disclose anything you want in a privacy policy though most people never read it. Not even most enterprises. While it’s a hot button issue and sounds good, doesn’t mean much. For legal reasons, policies should have clear disclosures that data is being shared though the practical reality is that it won’t impact people much as they generally don’t look.

1. Connectivity: This is the though issue in that if you are on a phone, you should assume you are being followed by your phone company – unless you want to go back to analog phones. Assume over the next 5 years, your data will be combined so that based on your phone, your web surfing, purchase and credit data will be merged by big companies to understand who you are and literally where you stand. We can legislate against it though in the long run, it helps consumers as it gives them better access to relevant content.

      Digital Industry Perspective:  Industry wants the ability to track and target you wherever you are and build as deep targeting profiles as possible. This makes them more money, enabling them to spend more on content and gives consumers a more relevant experience.

      Consumer Advocacy Prospective: Its scary that you’re watching me. I want to know your watching me and be able to opt-out of being stalked by evil advertisers.

      Non Digital Industry Perspective:  Data is pervasive. I want to understand how to tie my data into digital so im not left behind and I want to be able to use the data as much as possible.

      Practical Reality: Consumers want free. Free costs money. Better advertising doesn’t cost the consumer anything so it’s a natural tradeoff. Just need to make sure everything is disclosed (for what its worth) and penalties in place for serious financial data breaches. If someone ties digital targeting with payment information together it’s great for billing though it should come with stiff penalties for putting people at risk if you lose the data.

 
Key Takeaways: (note: opinion)

1. Your personal financial information should be sacred and you should have the ability to control how its used for your own credit purposes to protect against identity theft. There should be stiff penalties for letting financial information slip in that if you let info slip, anyone whose record you let slip that gets identity theft within 12 months, you should be liable for whether its traceable to you or not. That should be enough of an incentive to take better care.

1. Transparency should be there though is not really super relevant and there should be a clear opt-out of data collection. Carefully regulate ad data so that it is clear people are watching and targeting you.

I decided to test the system and they realized that first attempt at putting in gibberish was fake, however when I typed in test@fool.com, it let me slide. They really need to do a verification of your email address and cookie you in order to make it a higher quality data capture.

However, I am still impressed by their use of the technique. It is a money maker for sure for building their database. Use with caution. If your content isn’t juicy enough, users will just go away!

So I used to carry a camera everywhere. I had a little belt clip and carried by Canon camera everywhere, snapping pictures as I went through my data. However since I got the iPhone an interesting thing happened, I both stopped carrying my camera and primarily stopped taking pictures. Yes, I still take the requisite  party shots though what previously would have been 20 photos, is now just  a single shot, or maybe two. I don’t have data to back this  up though I’m convinced that people are actually taking less photos now than previously – though uploading and sharing more the ones that they do take. While an argument could be made that it’s a flight to quality, I think its more a flight to selective sharing. Sending around the picture of you with the stunning hostess of the party though not taking the 20 other pictures of what otherwise would be great memories. That leads to the issue of selective memory. With great power comes great responsibility. With great technology, comes great choice. We choose to (selectively) overshare J .

And it begs the question: What is the future of the camera industry? Will the iPhone crush all but the most ardent photographer ?

Note: these techniques are simply observations I have had other the years and not meant as scientific fact. For better research, see my dear friend Olivia Fox’s book on Charisma. (link).  They are in no particular order.

1. Find Common Ground; this is often the first technique taught in negotiations class. Find a common area of agreement, preferably not in the area of your target sale so that you can connect on something other than the what you are negotiating over. Here its good to look people up on facebook and linkedin and figure out what common friends, interests, contexts you have and then ask questions.
2. Make eye contact; the most powerful point of connection is eye contact. Its said that if you look someone in the eyes, deeply for more than 5 seconds, you can create a connection that is akin to falling in love with someone. I suggest make clear eye contact, preferably with a slightly tilted head and gaze at the other person. This can be completely platonic and in a business setting, it’s a matter of just looking into instead of at the other person, and then smile. It creates the feeling of warmth. The best salespeople are the ones you want to be around. Just look at the conversations you have and what the people who you connect best with do (many naturally).
3. Come in relaxed; take a minute and breathe, chill and relax before going into the meeting (or on the date). People can smell stress and rushing. You want to come off with neutral positive energy. Meditation is a great way to create relaxation.
4. Be confident in who you are; this can be the most difficult one and can override all of the others. Confidence is the worlds best sales technique and aphrodisiac. Slow down your demeanor, walk, talk straight and smooth and slow down your voice, allow your confidence to shine and show through.
5. Assume the other person is the greatest person in the world; if you approach every encounter as if your opponent is the great person in the world, the nicest sweetest, greatest, most awesome, its pretty hard to go off course. The warm energy you generate by assuming the best for your friend should fall onto all others in the room. Its not contentious if your negotiating (or dating) the most amazing person in the world. You are lucky to be there and grateful for the experience.
6. 6.    Find a way to support the other person without asking for anything; karma points. Do good onto your brethren without asking for compensation. The simplest ways to do this is by offering (and then making) connections and by sharing content and articles of interest. It takes 5 minutes to make an introduction and 2 minutes to share intelligence of interest. Do a google or twitter search and then share the results. Put good karma into the world and it will come back around.
7. 7.    Notice their breathe and sync your breathing; this is an advanced technique. Pay attention to the rhythm of their breathing and follow the same pattern. (as a backup – start  breathing slowly, in through your  nose and out through your mouth – it has a calming effect on you and therefore on those around you). 

Yes, there are plenty other techniques you can use, and these won’t always work. People can be guarded and you really need to be genuine for them to work properly. So if you are trying to game your prey – well then likely the highest quality prey will realize they are prey and walk away. However, if you want to build true long term relationships, then these are some things to pay attention to. With that said, Deep Chemistry (see post) trumps all technique. Thus is life.

My thesis is that there are 2 basic types of Chemistry; Deep & Experiential.

Deep Chemistry is what you feel when you meet someone and you ‘click’ (see Ori Brafman’s book) with them. It is the ability to fall into ‘natural’ conversation where nothing is really off limits and you accept each other as you are. The key here is acceptance and mutual respect. While you can develop it over time, in general you either have natural chemistry or you don’t. Deep Chemistry is what we as humans crave for our emotional well being. We just want it. All of it and much of it. It’s the perfect partnership in theory as you connect.

Experiential Chemistry is what you feel when you have great experiences with people. It can be doing a deal with someone and when you are both in the zone you riff perfectly back and forth or it can be when you have magically romantic dates or someone on your basketball team when you are on the court. However Experiential Chemistry leaves when out of context of that experience. You can have the most amazing deal experience or date experience and have a great time, so great you end up working with or just with someone for years. However, once the experiences stop, there is a certain lacking connection that is hard to cross.

Which Chemistry is more important? It depends on what you want. You can have amazing Deep Chemistry and have a terrible relationship and you can have the best Experiential Chemistry but never quite are happy since you don’t feel the last leg of click when you are outside of your experiences.

The dream of course is to have both. If forced to choose, I’m a romantic at heart and will choose Deep Chemistry over Experiential Chemistry though it’s a very hard choice. Deep relationships tend to be more volatile over time with bigger fights, partially because of the deep connection so you’re more comfortable that the other person won’t leave, and partially because its just easier (and usually more fun) to fight with someone you connect with. If its experiential, the fights are usually more tactical and bland and quick and not quite as much fun.

1. Skill (Vocational) Smarts; a master computer programmer or basketball player could be the best in the world at what they do. Usually it is a mixture of learned and natural skills in that vocation.
   1. Learned Smarts; someone who can study and do well on a test or learn a sill. This is book smarts and a derivative of Skill Smarts.
   2. Street Smarts; someone who is very good at navigating life situations. This is very different from. David is very street smart in that he always figures out his way out of jams or into unique situations.
      1. Emotional Smarts; This is also called maturity, the ability to understand emotional (people) situations. Its similar to Street Smarts though not quite the same.
      2. Survival Smarts; when shit hits the fan, you’ve got the basic skill set to survive from directions to camp fires to leadership
      3. Social Smarts; you can read social situations, many people with social smarts are also chameleons and can fit in anywhere. This is your event planner, socialite personality.
      4. Memory; self explanatory
      5. 4.    Intelligence; this is the highest level of smarts though is not reliant on any other form of smarts. Intelligence is the ability to apply other people’s smart and figure out complex situations (usually by seeing them in simple form)

So what kind of Smart are you ?